MTV Awards Show Surpasses 9/11

In what can only be described as one of the great disasters in modern television history, a national audience watched in horror as MTV made yet another effort to maintain its presence in the American consciousness.






The highlight of the evening gave viewers an opportunity to guess how long it would be before the idiots who scheduled Britney Spears' performance would be sacked. Sources close to the Rag Box have suspected for some time that the ability of MTV to remain hip in today's ever-changing culture has waned if not disappeared completely. That Ms. Spears was allowed to perform as part of the evening's entertainment is a case in point.


It is believed that those in charge of programming for the awards presentation show will transfer to FOX television where their skills will be only slightly modified to fit the character of that particular network.

As for Ms Spears, she was unavailable for comment in the same way that she was unavailable to perform. Rag Box Entertainment Bureau Chief, Edward R. Burrow, was dispatched to MTV headquarters but was turned away by security guards who explained that CEO and chairperson of MTV, Judy McGrath, had soiled her clothing and would be unavailable for an interview. Former CEO, Tom Freston refrained from commenting on the current situation, but according to Burrow, he appeared giddy.

The only person more pleased than Freston appeared to be former president and chief operating officer Mark Rosenthal, who recently resigned due to a sudden influx of intelligence.